BIXBY – Drew Stevens would rather have his 12-year-old son back. But he knows he can’t.
By KIM ARCHER World Staff Writer
Published: 1/19/2012 2:34 AM
Last Modified: 1/19/2012 4:21 AM
Instead, he honors his son’s legacy by traveling to schools and spreading the message Josh Stevens lived every day – be kind.
“Josh had a heart that was so kind. He would look for a child who felt like they were alone or who somebody was picking on, and he would go talk to them or stand up for them,” Stevens told students Wednesday at several Bixby schools.
Josh died Sept. 5, 2008, in a golf cart accident one block from the family’s Las Vegas home. He was a month away from turning 13.
Stevens counts the days, every day, since Josh lost his life. On Wednesday, it had been 1,230 days that Stevens and his family have lived without Josh.
“It’s a day-by-day thing. It’s excruciating,” he said. “Friends told me I would stop counting, but I haven’t yet. I don’t think I ever will.”
Stevens and his wife, Barbara Stevens, formed the Josh Stevens Foundation and launched the Be Kind movement aimed at kindergarten- through 12th-grade students as a tribute to his son, who was known throughout his community for his kindness.
“This was Josh’s gift. This is Josh’s legacy. Josh was not rich or famous. But he has a legacy,” Stevens told students. “Your legacy is not complete. Your legacy is right here and now.”
The gymnasium was quiet, the kids attentive.
Stevens explained that a legacy is what people will remember about you once you are gone.
“How will you be remembered when you leave this school? I’m telling you right now – if you enjoy hurting other kids, you’re in for a world of trouble,” he said. “If you make bad choices early, your life is going to be difficult.”
Stevens told students that if they start to say mean things to another person, they should stop themselves.
“Stop. Swallow your words,” he said. “Words hurt terribly.”
The old saying that “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me” is false, he said.
Stevens said that for a time as a child, he had many broken bones. Two boys in second grade made fun of him mercilessly, pushing him, pulling his hair.
“I don’t remember how that broken bone felt. But even though that was 40 years ago, I can close my eyes right this minute and remember how my heart felt,” he said.
Bixby North Elementary School Principal Phil Streets said the Be Kind movement isn’t a one-shot proposition. The school will continue it throughout the year with a host of activities, including rewarding students with special cards and bracelets when they get “caught” being kind.
The Be Kind movement has spread throughout Nevada into Illinois, California, Minnesota, Oregon and now Oklahoma, Stevens said.
“People questioned this. They asked, ‘Will (the kids) get it?’ ” he said. “Well, yes, they do. Kids are getting it. It’s working.”
PTA Council President Dyan Mumma said the movement is needed in a society in which people are so focused on themselves.
“Instead of focusing on anti-bullying, this focuses on the positive and how to treat other people,” she said.
Her 10-year-old son, Blake Mumma, said he liked the message.
“It seems really important to me,” he said.
In some ways, Stevens said, he recently realized that this movement is good for his own heart. Even in death, Josh is making the world a better place.
“The words that you choose and the way you treat each other can change the world,” he said. “Genuine kindness borne from the heart of a child deserves to be celebrated.”
Original Print Headline: Father carries boy’s legacy of kindness to students
